it's been a minute
lots has happened
lots has changed
last night was halloween..out of fucking control soooo much fun, but kels ended up getting her car impounded soo not a perf night :/ but close
i have been having a LOT of fun lately
i can honestly say i have never been as happy as i am right now
life is beautiful


Have you broken the law in the last 3 days?
errday

Do you know anyone who is addicted to drugs? Are you friends with them?
not addicted but yea i know some users

Who was the last person to grab your butt? Who was the last person's butt YOU grabbed? Why?
some guy at the club last night..some guy at the club last night

Where is the one boy/girl you want to see the most right now?
prolly at home

Do you think your last ex deserves to die?
...no i hope he has a happy wonderful life that i am never ever a part of again

Do you want your tongue pierced?
kinda

Would you be mad if your best friend dated the person you liked?
yes

Is anyone over- protective of you?
yup

Plans for tomorrow?
i'm not doin shit for a while i've gotta recover...but i always say that so we'll see :P

Have you made a mistake in the past week?
always

What's running through your mind right now?
i should run

What's upsetting you right now?
my knees are royaly fucked up

Do you know anyone named Joshua?
my brother :)

Has anyone ever called you beautiful?
yupp

Who was the last person you hugged?
britton

Will you be in a relationship in 4 months?
idk

If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?
absolutely

What were you doing at 7:00 AM?
ptfoed on loe's couch

Is it possible to be single and happy?
i am single and  am happy

Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months?
maybs

Do you think two people can last forever?
yes but idk if they can do it happily

Would you put yesterday on repeat and live it forever?
yes.

Did you ever kiss someone with a tattoo?
yup

Do you drink tea?
occasionally

Does anyone like you?
uhmm

Would you date someone taller than you?
i have to i'm short

Did you have a dream last night?
nooooclue

Have you talked to a complete asshole today?
nope

When's the next time you'll see your friends?
tomorrow

What did you do today?
laid around in sweats

Did you speak to your mother today?
yup

Do you have a bestfriend?
yup

Last time you laughed so hard? Why?
last night when loe's sword broke


Last time you were upset?
uhmmm...idk prolly at work

What lyrics are stuck in your head?
ro-ma-ro-ma-ma ga-ga-oh-la-la

What’s something you’re not looking forward to?
payday

If your best friend needed somewhere to stay could they live with you?
yup

Have you ever cried in front of your number one?
no numbered friends on lj

Do you have any piercings?
7 in my ears 1 in my nose 1 in my lip

How many people do you fully trust ?
3..me myself and i

Would your parents be mad if you got pregnant now?
oh yea

Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed?
yup

Did anyone call you pretty recently?
yup :)

Are there any bruises on your body? How did they get there?
tonssss from crawlin allll over the ground

Are you wearing something that belongs to someone else?
nope

What do you hate most about girls?
the fact that they secretly want every other girl to fail...fuck that

Who was the last person who called you?
loe

When did you last cry?
idk im not a crier

Last thing you wrote your name on?
credit card slip

last....saturday maybe went over jills with reba and had a slumber party. got smashed. jill ate one of my cigarette butts jumped in the pool with all of her clothes on and ptfoed at like 11:30 cuz she's a queer. me and rebs stayed up til like 5 though just sitting outside and talking about everything under the sun. watched evil dead and passed out.

sunday went to ground round. no i went to ground round saturday.  so jillians was friday. anyways. blazzed. loe ryan pam and matty came. it was like a bullard family reunion. kmart got SHITTYwasted. i really expected her to puke. carl and brandon showed up but they sat in a van in the parking lot and drank and by the time they came in we were leaving.

i don't know what i did sunday monday tuesday or wednesday. one of them was susie's b-day and i went to her work for lunch with kris. then we got her cards and sunflowers and a giraffe and made her a cake. watched the movie life as a house for the first time. loved it. so sad. all the rest of the days i hung out with jill and/or greg. but idk what we did. prolly not much.

thursday went comic bowling with jill and greg cuz they had a bunch of free passes.we all suck at bowling. greg left before we even finished the game cuz patrick called me and said laurie threw all his shit on the lawn and he needed someone with an suv to help him. but they didn't even use greg's car. it was weird. jill and i decided to go to a strip club. drove all the way there realized neither one of us had any singles to give those ladies and left. hit a pothole on the way back and got a flat tire. triple a was real fast though. by the time greg got done helping patrick and called me i was asleep. whoops.

friday helped jill make a million jello shots for rach's grad party with greg and liz. then went to malarkys with gena and chrissy. i really didnt plan on drinking very much, but people kept buying us shots. i don't turn down free alcohol. so i ended up smashed as usual. ryan douglas came and danced with us, and i'm 85% sure he didn't even realize he knew me until i said something. saw tina vavro went i was leaving and she invited me to a party at her house. so gena and i took her car to my house and walked over. it was real random people there and it kinda felt like a high school reunion. kylie was there and it was really nice to hang out with her. we used to be joined at the hip and that was the first time i'd seen her in years. stumbled home at around 5 realized i left my camera and had to go all the way back. idk how i made it home.

last night was rach's grad party. it was just plain out of control. everyone there was completely wrecked. reba greg and i just kept stealing handfuls of jelloshots and sitting under the tent. we ended up in the pool at some point which i remember being really really funny. dale was blitzed. i have never seen him like that in my life. i could not stop laughing.  rach had like 5 meltdowns.had a photoshoot on the lawn. walked down the street and got in random cars to smoke. finally came inside and kicked a bunch of seniors off the couch so we could sleep.

today i am hungover. it's not so bad now it was rough earlier though. i'm finna have a fire, but it's lookin like rain. hope not cuz i've been craving a fire.

i think i'm done

i've been a debbie downer for like a week
and i'm over it
it's time for goodtimes ashley to make a comeback i think







also i think i might be in love with jimmy stewart
the philadelphia story
is one of the best movies ever
and i forgot all about it

brad had two holes drilled in his skull yesterday
i'm about to go see him with gena in a minute
and i'm really nervous
i'm afraid he's gunna be in a lot of pain
and i don't wanna see him like that
a year ago i would have prayed about it
but i don't even know what to pray to anymore

brad just went back into the er because he's had a headache for a fews days and his brain might be bleeding again and i have no idea if he's gunna be ok or not

my oldest friend in the world right now just told me he's not sure he if he can talk to me right now

my mom has fucking cancer

oh and my dog is being given away within the next week


since i've been home from bitely
it's been one blow after another
my life is falling the fuck apart and
i'm seriously considering becoming and alcoholic until this shit gets better
if it gets better

and if i'm not already an alcoholic

pet cemetary
is better than pet cemetary 2
nothing is ever as good as the original
and that works with more than just movies

jill showed me some crazy torrent thing that has like every artist in the world's whole discography
and it's effing free
made my whole life
for reals

my computer broke
but my laptop is here
so it's ok
one of the cd-roms is missing
missing
it's just gone
someone tell me how that happens
it doesn't

i'm gunna start reading more
i used to ead all the time
idk wtf happened
but i'm gunna make myself get back into it

i'm lovin le tigre right now

i want hardwood floors
they make a nice noise when you walk on them



kk goodnight

it feels like my whole life is waiting. waiting to go somewhere or do something. waiting for other people to get it together. i'm just wondering when the fuck im gunna GET THERE already.

bitely was pretty. it felt like 3 different trips because people kept leaving or showing up. swam, rode in the boat, rowed another boat, watched fireworks, watched tgif, got stuck in the wilderness in greg's car, and drank...A LOT

thursday night got home hung out with jill. went to the street fair to visit greg. walked around the whole thing lookin for the bouncers and singin prolly too loud. when we finally found the bouncers greg was gone, but we ended up meeting up with him and going to zorba's. turned my hair into a wig and watched greg lick a chilli ketchup ranch mess off the plate.

friday i went to ypsi with jill. i met charlotte and ashley v. and morgan was there. i can't even really explain what happened. we started at charlottes house and ended at ashley's, and there were several stops in between. i know that i loved it though. charlotte listens to great music and ashley v is just the shit period.

saturday...uhmmm...OH kris and i got pizza and sparks and played at her house. reba came over and we watched pet semetary 2. sparks tastes like satan's asshole, but it works. i was runnin on like 3 hours of sleep though so i dipset kinda early.

sunday jood and pj got home from camping :) the new pop-up was at our house for all of a few hours before i backed into it and broke one of the tail-lights. whoops. played tennis with reba finally. it was butt hot so we only got 1 set in, but it was still fun. then hung out with jill loela and greg. got half-offs and bullshitted.

yesterday laid out and swam with jill all day long. made the most dead serious whirlpool ever and played volleyball. kinda sunburnt. when the sun went down we did laps around meijer. we were gunna go cosmic bowling, but we realized we were both in flip-flops with no socks. so we decided bowling would have to wait til another day and just went back to jill's and watched trueblood(amazing).

OH and my rasta bracelet is finished and i love it!!!


and i want to go to the DIA more than i want to do almost anything else right now

i guess we're all just one phonecall away
from our knees

last thursday i think went to ryan b's birthday extravaganza at tom's. got to hear most of a carl coffee ghost story which was mostly nonsense and definately fiction. good times tho. ended up at zorba's with ryan b britt and ryan a. our waitress HATED us...especially ryan a who for the record laughs like a hyena.
friday went to kmarts with briTTon and greg to watch the wings lose the stanley cup. sucksville. got absolutely shit wasted and don't remember much of anything. from what i've been told i went in the flat rock taco bell bathroom with no shoes on then smoked 4 cigarettes on the way back to kmarts. played steamroller in her neighbors yard by myself. passed out in a chalupa. passed out on g and drooled on him. then passed out on the sidewalk with a blanket a pillow and a lighter. woke up at 6:30 still drunk and threw up then slept on the bathroom floor. i have NO idea what happened with britt but when i woke up ryan b was there. kmart spent the entire night crying and throwing up. and drunk dialing. reba came too? with tom. but i don't think i had my eyes open the whole time she was there because i didn't see her.
the rest of the week i was sooobeeer. read lord of the flies again. i forgot how awful the end is...but still a good book. i started reading grapes of wrath yesterday. not really the into it yet but we'll see what happens.
also talked to zack.  after 4 years of me saying he has anger issues and him ignoring me kris calls him drunk friday and very calmly explains to him that he's an asshole and THAT he hears. it was good though, and i think we're gunna be able to be freinds. maybe.
friday made jello shots at kmarts and hung out with britt reba greg tom and robbie. shittyshitfaced. well me and reba were anyway. lost my ipod at some point. sad panda.
yesterday saw jilllllllllllz. heard all about her drunken mess of a vacation. met thomas.
today's father's day. much love to pj thanks for creating me :)
oh yea and i got the new dave matthew's band cd. well, actually i bought it for kmart and then put it on my ipod which is gone now. so i had it. it's amazinggg
ok seeya

tuesday? i think it was tuesday at least....i woke up in a bathtub
in shitsilanti
with writing on my arm once again
but i was alone
and fully dressed
so i'm gunna go ahead and call that night a success

came home and passed out
kriskross woke me up and i picked her up and went to tom and john's band practice with her
they were better than i thought they were gunna be
but i fell asleep a couple times

kmart got baked
we went to target
she was hilarious

came home and cleaned
then kris jill reba britt ryan carl khan and chello came over to watch the game
we lost
suck
then pretty much everyone dipset
kris n jill stayed and carl ended up coming back
he did not tell a ghost story
our friendship almost died

yesterday was the longest day ever
i finished reading sidhartha, colored, played video games, watched a movie, and took a nap
when i woke up it was only 6:30
ridiculous
i ended up meeting tricktrick at ground round for drinks cuz he got off work early
then we went back to his house for a fire
with random people that i knew through other people
but it was a good time

today was maybe the worst day ever
or at least this year

zack came over to get all his stuff
yea
that was fun

i walked away from the last 6 years of my life and i'm not sure what to do with myself now
i think i need a drink
i'm supposed to hang out with kmart n jill cuz jill is going to mexico tomorrow
but i dunno what is going on
all i know is i am not sitting here alone much longer
i need a friend